Think back to the last time you started a new job, a new class, or began training for a new sport. How did it go the first time you did a new task associated with it? Whether it was remembering the right side orders for your first big table as a waiter, giving the first speech in a communications class, or throwing your first pitch at baseball practice, I’m going to bet it was probably pretty awkward. Not because I don’t believe in you; it’s just we’re all awkward the first time we do something.
Over the last 15 years, I’ve gained some level of skill at public speaking. I’ve been exposed a variety of audiences in many different places, and I’ve come to deeply enjoy sharing stories from a stage. Yet, it wasn’t always this way. It began with a very, very awkward first speech to a group of about a dozen other kids in the back room of a rented-out church building.
The days leading up to my speech were nerve-wracking days. I didn’t volunteer to give the speech; it was a mandatory part of being in the 4-H club. I was simply and purely terrified, but there was nothing to be done. I couldn’t just quit 4-H (although, trust me, I thought about it very seriously). The big day rolled around, I reluctantly showed up to the meeting, and waited in dread for the allotted time for speeches at the end. Alas, they didn’t forget about me, and my little hands were shaking as I picked up my speech script and made my way up to the front of the room. As soon as I looked out at the crowd (the small group sitting around a singular horseshoe table arrangement), I quickly decided that was a bad idea and looked back down at my paper. My grandiose presentation? Reading a recipe for homemade brownies. Yep, that was the speech. I ad-libbed one part about how I used extra cocoa powder for a richer chocolate-y taste, but otherwise, it was verbatim the words on the paper. It was the most terrifying speech I’ve ever given, and it opened the gate to a world of new opportunities for me; yet, I would be silly to say I became a skilled speaker after that day. The real reward was after the hard work and practice of many, many speeches that followed.
Back to where we started: the first time you do something new, you’re probably not very good at it, and you’re probably scared to do it. What about the second time? Probably, you were a little less awkward, but probably, it was still a little intimidating. The first step is the biggest hurdle, but it’s not always smooth sailing from there on out. In fact, the first, hardest experience we have may not teach us as much as the repetitions that follow. This is where our next powerlifting lesson comes in: you gain the most strength in the back down sets. Let me explain.
A typical training session for a particular lift in a powerlifting program will look something like this:
The first set, two reps at 155 pounds, is what we call a “top set.” It’s the heaviest weight I’ll lift on that particular day. Yet, I only do one set at that top end weight; the other five sets are the back down sets. While the sets of four at 145 and 135 are less intense, they are actually where the most real strength is gained. After the heavy exposure of the top set, our muscles are primed to experience the stimulus in the following sets. Lifters who frequently skip their back downs will consistently fail to make progress at the same rate as those who faithfully follow through.
The tricky part? The back down sets aren’t always very fun, and they’re pretty darn tempting to skip. By the time I hit my sixth set of bench press for the day, I’m pretty fatigued, and that 135 just doesn’t move as fast as it did in the 3rd set, and definitely not as fast as when I was warming up. My ego doesn’t like that; it would be easier to just hit the top number, feel proud of myself, and move on.
In life, we have back down sets. They appear in two forms: the opportunity to practice something again and again, and the opportunity to follow-up on something we did. To learn from the top set, I believe we must execute the back down sets well. Let’s dive in to the two ways life’s back down sets show up.
1) To be excellent, we must practice.
Wouldn’t it be so much easier if we were good at something the first time? Or, even the second time? That wouldn’t be so bad, either. Yet, in nearly every case, we’re not very good the second time, or even the third time. The 10,000 hour rule to become a professional at something may not always be precisely true, but it’s for sure more than 10 hours. How often do we give up on something early in the game simply because we lack the patience to practice enough to get good at it? We must learn to be patient with ourselves, knowing it takes repetition after repetition to become excellent. The first time I negotiated a deal with a customer, I was pretty nervous. And you know what? The second time, I was too; not quite as much, but it still wasn’t a walk in the park for me. I struggle to be patient with myself, but I’m learning it’s okay to not be good at something the third time I do it. I’m getting better each time, my form is improving, and next week, I can probably load some more weight on the bar because I did my back downs this week. You can do the same.
2) To be excellent, we must follow through.
The other application for real-life back down sets is the idea of following through. How many times have you done a big task, but then failed to do the small tasks that came after? Maybe you wrote a big paper and submitted it to your professor for feedback, but by the time you get the red pen edits, you just don’t have the motivation to actually make those changes. You executed a successful event in your internship, but you didn’t take the time to leave a record of how you did it so the next person could build on it. You had a valuable club or work meeting, but never typed up the notes to make an action plan. Doing all of those things doesn’t mean that much if we don’t do the work after the work. This is such a big part of my job, and frankly, the follow-through is the most mundane. It’s all fun and games to drive around all day and chat with my customers, but to sit down at the end of the afternoon and send follow-up emails? Not so exciting. Yet, the follow-ups are what differentiate you as a salesperson; anyone can show up and talk, but it takes extra effort to follow up and follow through on requests and opportunities. Where are you missing out on making a difference by following through?
You may be familiar with the quote “Opportunity is missed by most people because it goes around in overalls looking like hard work,” often attributed to Thomas Edison. I think we can rephrase that to “Back down sets are skipped by most people because they go around in overalls looking like hard work.” The not-so-glamorous practice sessions, the emails sent, the edits made… these mundane tasks are so important to growth and improvement in every area of life, yet because of their nature, they are often forgotten or deliberately skipped. What might your life look like a month from now, a year from now, 15 years from now, if you started giving as much attention to the back down sets as you do to the top set? I promise, if I can come a long way from giving a shaky, nervous speech about a brownie recipe to a dozen kids in the back room of a church, you can make some pretty serious progress in whatever it is you hope to achieve.
Journal Prompt of the Week
What do back down sets look like in your own life? Have you been caught skipping them?
I learned something from reading this